Woman from ‘The Far Side’

When I was younger and a gigging musician, my stage attire often involved a lot of make up. On this particular night, on our way to a show, my face had been painted similarly to how Alice Cooper does his make up. I used to enjoy freaking people out a little; unless the show was happening near Halloween my appearance could be quite a shock to some folks….

Careful What You Wish For

…This story is about a character who’s name I won’t use, because speaking his name or typing it usually causes him to pop up and try to contact me in some way. It has happened, almost without fail, for all the time I’ve known him. I’ll tell a story about him, or mention his name, and suddenly I will receive a text message or phone call from him. It’s not that I never want to see him again, but rather that he’s the type of chaotic crazy that belongs in a long-closed chapter of my life. For my purposes here, I’ll simply call him the Captain….

Road Phantoms

We took the long way there to allow time for pot smoking, and on the home stretch of Franklin St I saw her – a tall, pale woman with curly hair in a polka dot dress, standing just enough in the road to be alarming. She appeared to be soaked from head to toe and she gazed at us from a tilted forward neck position as we approached. I was holding a hit and had just passed the joint when my friend swerved around her. It took me a second to realize – wait, he saw it too?
“Damn!” He said, “did you see that chick? She’s gonna get hit standing there!”
I informed him that she wasn’t there. At least, she wouldn’t be if we went back. Just another Road Phantom…